by T.J. Wallace

GUEST COLUMNIST

The life of a can really isn't that exciting. Oh sure, there's that whole amusement park ride you get to go through that takes you from a shelf, heats you up to a billion degrees, fills you full of foodstuff, smacks a hat and coat on you, and sends you spinning down a conveyor to sit and cool off on another shelf. Let me tell you, for a can, that's a thrill ride. Ben took that same ride that all cans make. Ben's story starts at the back of the pantry. When he first arrived, he was surrounded by other beans. One by one, the other cans began to disappear. But they're all gone now. It's just him and a few cans left on the backside of his label.

Ben sat staring at his dust collection and had begun to wonder about the purpose of shelf life and whether there was life after shelf. All he really ever wanted was to have a healthy relationship as part of a real meal, just like any other can of beans. It was during one of these moments that Ben was suddenly lifted off the shelf and dropped into a thin plastic bag with a bunch of other cans. "Where are we going?" he cried out. There was a sudden thud that sounded like a bag of canned good items hitting concrete and the rim of Ben's lid dented a little.

"I'm not certain, but I think we're on the porch," said a voice. As Ben settled into the bag he turned to see a boxed food item. "I'm Max, Max Aroniancheez."

"How long do you think we'll be here?" said another voice. "I'm Penny. I'm a pasta and if it rains my noodles will get all frizzy and it'll just ruin my shelf life."

Suddenly the bag of food items was picked up and dropped into a bigger pile of bagged food items. Ben could hear the muffled voices of other cans, but the Italian tomatoes had too much of an accent to understand. Again, his bag was picked up and they were all dumped out into a large pile. As Ben looked around he could see piles of food everywhere. "What's going on?" he thought out loud.

"Well," blurted a saucy bottle of blended apples, "if you had paid any attention to the side of your bag, you would have noticed that this is the 'Scouting for Food' Drive." Ben hadn't noticed. He is a can of beans after all. Ben caught a glimpse of his new friends Max and Penny being picked up and placed with others who had similar packaging. Ben himself was placed in a box with other beans. He had never seen so many types of beans -- green, pinto, kidney, black, red, refried and corn. Wait a minute, corn isn't a bean. That must be a sorting error. Ben wanted to tell someone, but none of the boys who were boxing the cans were speaking. What is an Order of the Arrow ordeal anyway?

Once again, Ben was sitting on a shelf. This time, however, the pantry was much, much bigger and brighter. He heard someone mention something about a food bank.

Ben hardly had any time to re-start his dust collection when he was carried off again. He was placed into another box. This time there was stuffing, pears, tuna, corn and Bisquick. Oh my! This could be his chance to be a meal! He had only been sitting on this last shelf for two days and the shelves were already near bare again. Whatever this bank of food was, cans didn't stay here long.

Ben was excited to see his new shelf, but he never made it. He heard a whirring sound and felt a slight sting when suddenly his hat popped off. He barely had time to figure out where the sound was coming from when all of his insides were dumped into a boiling pot of water to simmer with a pat of butter and a bit of seasoning. With his shelf life void, Ben was tossed aside like trash. Such is the life of a can.

On March 29, more than 1,000 Scouters from 166 units in Tooele County collected nearly 36,000 of Ben's friends during the Scouting for Food Drive. The food collected during this drive replaces two food deliveries from the Salt Lake Food Bank for one week.